note to reader--if you are an "artist"--an "individualist"--a "tragic romantic"--read the following with glee...
Enneagram Fours
Level 1 (At Their Best): Profoundly creative, expressing the personal and the universal, possibly in a work of art. Inspired, self-renewing and regenerating: able to transform all their experiences into something valuable: self-creative.
Level 2: Self-aware, introspective, on the "search for self," aware of feelings and inner impulses. Sensitive and intuitive both to self and others: gentle, tactful, compassionate.
Level 3: Highly personal, individualistic, "true to self." Self-revealing, emotionally honest, humane. Ironic view of self and life: can be serious and funny, vulnerable and emotionally strong.
Average Levels
Level 4: Take an artistic, romantic orientation to life, creating a beautiful, aesthetic environment to cultivate and prolong personal feelings. Heighten reality through fantasy, passionate feelings, and the imagination.
Level 5: To stay in touch with feelings, they interiorize everything, taking everything personally, but become self-absorbed and introverted, moody and hypersensitive, shy and self-conscious, unable to be spontaneous or to "get out of themselves." Stay withdrawn to protect their self-image and to buy time to sort out feelings.
Level 6: Gradually think that they are different from others, and feel that they are exempt from living as everyone else does. They become melancholy dreamers, disdainful, decadent, and sensual, living in a fantasy world. Self-pity and envy of others leads to self-indulgence, and to becoming increasingly impractical, unproductive, effete, and precious.
Unhealthy Levels
Level 7: When dreams fail, become self-inhibiting and angry at self, depressed and alienated from self and others, blocked and emotionally paralyzed. Ashamed of self, fatigued and unable to function.
Level 8: Tormented by delusional self-contempt, self-reproaches, self-hatred, and morbid thoughts: everything is a source of torment. Blaming others, they drive away anyone who tries to help them.
Level 9: Despairing, feel hopeless and become self-destructive, possibly abusing alcohol or drugs to escape. In the extreme: emotional breakdown or suicide is likely. Generally corresponds to the Avoidant, Depressive, and Narcissistic personality disorders.
Key Motivations: Want to express themselves and their individuality, to create and surround themselves with beauty, to maintain certain moods and feelings, to withdraw to protect their self-image, to take care of emotional needs before attending to anything else, to attract a "rescuer."
Examples: Ingmar Bergman, Alan Watts, Sarah McLachlan, Alanis Morrisette, Paul Simon, Jeremy Irons, Patrick Stewart, Joseph Fiennes, Martha Graham, Bob Dylan, Miles Davis, Johnny Depp, Anne Rice, Rudolph Nureyev, J.D. Salinger, Anaîs Nin, Marcel Proust, Maria Callas, Tennessee Williams, Edgar Allan Poe, Annie Lennox, Prince, Michael Jackson, Virginia Woolf, Judy Garland, "Blanche DuBois" (Streetcar Named Desire), Thomas Merton.
Four: Romantic, Individualist, Artist - Driven by a desire to understand themselves and find a place in the world, they often fear that they have no identity or personal significance. Fours embrace individualism and are often profoundly creative and intuitive. However, they have a habit of withdrawing to internalize, searching desperately inside themselves for something they never find and creating a spiral of depression. The angsty musician or tortured artist is often a stereotypical Four. The corresponding "deadly sin" of the Four is Envy, while the Four's "holy idea" or essence is Holy Origin. Under stress, Fours express qualities of the Two, and when flourishing, they express qualities of the One.
One, Reformer, Critic, Perfectionist - This type focuses on integrity. Ones can be wise, discerning and inspiring in their quest for the truth. They also tend to dissociate themselves from their flaws or what they believe are flaws (such as negative emotions) and can become hypocritical and hyper-critical of others, seeking the illusion of virtue to hide their own vices. The One's greatest fear is to be flawed, and their ultimate goal is perfection. The corresponding "deadly sin" of the One is Anger, while the One's "holy idea" or essence is Holy Perfection. Under stress, Ones express qualities of the Four, and when flourishing, they express qualities of the Seven.
Point Four - The Romantic
Worldview: Something essential is missing from life. I'll be complete if I can just find it.
Unconscious Drive: Envy
Gift: Uniqueness and Emotional Intensity.
Fours have a singular ability to be present with life's more intense situations: grief, death, depression. Through their understanding of dark nights of the soul, they accompany others on the journey. Romantics model that you will eventually get through the difficult times, and illuminate the riches to be found in the depths. Fours brings originality and creativity to any enterprise. Often blessed with a strong sense of the dramatic and/or aesthetic, they prefer to make a unique contribution in life.
Dark side of the gift: Romantics crave emotional intensity and connection. Their highs and lows can be perceived as "too much" for the other types. A tendency toward dramatic presentation and affect can alienate other people. The Fours' attraction to melancholy and the "darker" emotions can seem like wallowing to the rest of us. At its worst, melancholy can slide into depression. Insistence on exhibiting their uniqueness or difference can be counterproductive to their own goals and offputting to others.
Internal terrain:A Four feels that something is missing in his/her life. Other people have it and the Romantic envies them. The Four longs for the missing element that will make them whole. There is a bittersweet flavor to Four's longing and melancholy. They crave a deep connection where they will be met emotionally. Authenticity is found in intense feeling states. If Fours can't find what will complete them, at least they will have intensity. Ordinariness is akin to a sort of death. Love and survival depend on being true to one's inner emotional terrain.
Enneagram Type 4 - The Individualist
Identity seekers, who feel unique and different
People of this personality type tend to build their identities around their perception of themselves as being somehow different or unique; they are thus self-consciously individualistic. Fours tend to see their difference from others as being both a gift and a curse - a gift, because it sets them apart from those they perceive as being somehow "common," and a curse, as it so often seems to separate them from the simpler forms of happiness that others so readily seem to enjoy. Thus, Fours can manage to feel superior to others while also secretly harboring some degree of longing and envy. A feeling of being a member of the "true aristocracy" alternates with deep feelings of shame, and fears of somehow being deeply flawed or defective.
Fours are emotionally complex and highly sensitive. They long to be understood and appreciated for their authentic selves, but easily feel misunderstood and unappreciated. They have a tendency to withdraw in the face of a world that seems harsh or crude, and are often somewhat moody or temperamental. They are emotionally centered and spend much of their lives immersed in their internal mental landscapes, where they feel free to cultivate and analyse their feelings. A desire to manifest this internal world often leads Fours to an interest in the arts, and some do become actual artists. Whether artistic or not, however, most Fours are aesthetically sensitive and concerned with self-expression and self-revelation, whether it be in the clothes they wear or in the overall nature of their often idiosyncratic lifestyles.
Fours are somewhat melancholic by disposition, and under stress tend to lapse into depression. They also tend to be self-absorbed, even under the best of circumstances, but when unbalanced, easily give way to a self-indulgence which they perceive as being fully justified as a way to compensate for the general lack of pleasure they experience in their lives. Rather than look for practical solutions to their difficulties, Fours are prone to fantasizing about a savior who will rescue them from their unhappiness.
EXECUTIVE DEVELOPMENT PLANfor Terry Crane -- Style Four
Note to the Reader: What follows is a development plan created for a Style Four executive. While "Terry" is unique in many ways, he also clearly illustrates how some Four dynamics play out in the workplace. As you read through this plan, begin to formulate what you would suggest as developmental actions for Terry and for Fours in general. Then compare your ideas against his actual development work.
I. CONCEPTUAL STYLE
(I am an INFP) which means I am more of a “feeler” than a “thinker” which makes organizing people and developing ideas into concrete terms more difficult than for “thinker” types as below—although we are very similar on other levels.
Found in only one percent of the population, INTPs (Introverted Thinking with Intuition) on the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI) are extremely precise in their thoughts and their language. They are referred to as "architects" of ideas and systems. Somewhat quiet and reserved (due to their introversion), they can become absorbed with ideas to the exclusion of external circumstances. As "thinking" types, they are logical, analytical, rational, curious, theoretical, abstract, principled, and objectively critical executives. They tend not to give much credence to authority based on position -- they prefer relationships based on expertise. Particularly if they are very bright, they can be intellectual snobs, becoming impatient with others who seem less principled and/or who are not as intelligent. This attitude may generate hostility and defensiveness in others, who often describe INTPs as "arrogant". As managers they prefer to have other independent types working for them, since they interact more at an intellectual than an emotional level. They tend to reward employees who are self-determined and independent. Excellent at identifying problems, INTPs find it more difficult to express appreciation. Because they rely on logic, their own feelings may well up and be expressed in inappropriate ways. (See Myers, Introduction to Type; Hirsh & Kummerow, Introduction to Type in Organizations; and Keirsey & Bates, Please Understand Me.)
II. PERSONALITY STYLE
Fours on the Enneagram are creative and individualistic leaders who often seem themselves as unique in a mundane organizational setting -- the shadow side of this characteristic, however, is a constant, low-level self-questioning ("Is there something wrong with me? Why don't I fit in?"). Fours try to understand themselves by focusing on their feelings -- when their ability to get in touch with their true feelings is underdeveloped they can become withdrawn and negative. The same talent that allows them to see things "outside the box" (and thus to be innovative organizationally) leads them to wonder why they never see things the way others do, and subsequently to question their own reality. Thus, instead of tenaciously championing their ideas, they often lose steam when they meet with the typical sources of organizational resistance. Because of their ability to see "how things could be," Fours may fall victim to "the grass is always greener" phenomenon; this shows up in fantasizing about others jobs and/or other companies, instead of dealing with current issues. They are also prone to envy, fueled by the belief that others somehow enjoy satisfactions they are denied. At the same time, they tend to keep life (and intimacy) at arm's length, because being happy might threaten their intense emotional world. Worse, they might have to settle for an "ordinary" life! (See Condon, The Enneagram Movie & Video Guide; Keys, Emotions and the Enneagram; Palmer, The Enneagram in Love & Work; and Riso/Hudson, Personality Types.)
III. KEY STRENGTHS
Sources of input to your development plan, Terry, see you as very, very bright -- with a logical yet creative thinking style. You are comfortable doing things differently (vs. "off-the-shelf" approaches). Described as a good problem-solver -- who is also very thorough at strategizing, planning, prioritizing, decision making, and implementing -- you seem to prefer the big picture to the "nitty-gritty", yet you get things done. Though you are direct, honest, and will say what is on your mind, you are generally "nonadversarial" in your approach to solving problems, and you are "great" with customers. Taken together with you notably high standards, these characteristics put you "in front of the pack" (see exceptions noted below).
You are naturally eloquent and give outstanding presentations. You were described as being well prepared, self-assured, multifaceted, and articulate -- you speak "with knowledge and authority." In addition, your style is convincing -- you speak seriously but with influence. In a group setting you are skilled at drawing people out when they are not participating.
Personally, you show "serious fiber" -- honesty, integrity, and quality -- and with a dry sense of humor. You also appear to be driven to succeed, "always wanting to be on point," "always the mouthpiece." You act as a beacon for others through your passion for excellence, and you get "exciting" results. Enhanced by your technical knowledge and hands-on experience, these qualities make you a real asset to your company.
IV. DEVELOPMENT OPPORTUNITIES
Others have complimented you on your response to recent feedback, noting that there are fewer disagreements, fewer mood swings, and "no explosions". The comments below describe your behavior prior to these changes and are meant to serve as a reminder rather than a reflection of your current state.
Management
Those outside your functional area note that people who work for you have the authority to do their jobs. Your direct reports have confirmed this, and even suggest that this has been true to a fault (for example, in the past you have at times forgotten to call in or to update them when you have been away from the office). They have described you as acting "close to the cuff," which is further reflected in the observation that people at lower organizational levels don't really know you. They requested that you share more information and knowledge about upper-management decisions, and that you involve people more in decisions affecting them. In addition, they want you to be more open to their opinions -- in the past you have not always probed for their viewpoint or gotten enough data before you jumped to decisions and actions.
Interpersonal Style
It appears that the combination of your eloquent, articulate style, along with your ability to be blunt, can make you seem somewhat arrogant, or even rude. This ranges from, "There is sometimes a contrived quality," to "People don't always understand what he is saying but are embarrassed to ask questions," to "Perhaps he is unaware that he's talking down to people," to "He seems to think he's better in some way," to "If he doesn't respect what you say he can blow your doors off real quick and not really mean it." That you are direct and not manipulative is to your credit, Terry, but you could be more user-friendly. You need to learn when not to be blunt (in the past, some of your internal contacts have avoided answering your calls). To be fair, it is clear that you have been under great pressure to get results and that you've succeeded in spite of not always getting the support you needed. Nonetheless, you have been described as having "an intolerance for imperfection" and occasionally "coming unglued."
Personal Style
There were a number of comments, Terry, that are consistent with your Enneagram Four personality style. You were actually described by one individual as "always an outsider" because you come from a different functional area of expertise. It appears, though, that you contribute to this distance: "He keeps people somewhere outside -- though some are closer than others." You convey the impression that you would rather be somewhere else: "He has a good job with a good future, but I don't think he's satisfied." Furthermore, you tend to focus on how things could be to the exclusion of appreciating what is. "One definition of stress," commented an observer, "is the gap between expectations and reality, and Terry has high expectations." (This has a plus side, of course, as indicated by another person who said, "He is relentless, idealistic, and enthusiastic about what he believes in -- he wants to do what's right.") Finally, your "moodiness" has been seen as a problem: "What may be a big problem to him may seem minor to others." "He has these personality swings and I wonder if it's something I've done."
"I'll marry the bent mirror" -- The Four”Enneagram Fours can be awesomely innovative. They have a personality style that brilliantly focuses on difference. Countering their special depths, they also envy others' apparent happiness. In their "bent mirror," this shows up as dissatisfaction with the ordinary. At their best, they learn to see the beauty in each moment as it evolves.”
I once likened Fours at their best to the compassion of the bodhisattva, who rejects relief from reincarnation and returns to help free others from suffering:
"The heroes and heroines of the Mahayana Buddhist tradition are the bodhisattvas, who vow to forswear nirvana until all beings are enlightened. As the Lotus Sutra tells us, their compassion endows them with supranormal senses: they can hear the music of the spheres and understand the language of the birds. By the same token, they hear as well all cries of distress, even to the moaning of beings in the lowest hells. All griefs are registered and owned in the bodhisattva's deep knowledge that we are not separate from each other" (Joanna Macy, in "Despair Work," Chapter 16 of Sacred Sorrows).
It is important to understand, however, that the bodhisattva's choice is voluntary, and not a return engagement because of any attachment to pain. Instead, their enlightenment is manifested in equanimity.
Likewise, the path of satori for Fours is found through equanimity; seeing that all events are intrinsically neutral, that it is desire that grades things as "good" or "bad."
Unenlightened Fours are attached to their pain, which shows up in the fixation of dissatisfaction. Their contribution to groups and organizations is their ability to look at things from the outside (where they live), and often in innovative ways. It is true that things could always be better, but there is a time and a place for change.
This fixation becomes a set of chains when we are always dissatisfied with how things are. With Fours this arises from the passion of envy and is often experienced as a dissatisfaction with self and with the ordinariness of one's life.
Whenever we obsess on being special, on feeling driven to create something unique, we are experiencing the passion of the Four.
In a way, even feeling sad or depressed can create a "special" identity. While any of us can be depressed, and seriously so, the angst of the Four is experienced as a deep, soulful sadness. In the same way that each of us has pressed on an aching tooth (to see if it still hurts!) unawakened Fours press on their own pain. This quality brought us the unique expression of Vincent Van Gogh. But it also keeps attachment to pain alive. Instead of using whatever happens as an opening, Fours tend to get lost in their sad feelings.
A change in perspective for Fours can result from reviewing their past history, focusing on the good things that have also happened to them, and noticing how often they have created their own dissatisfaction. The Buddhist way is to go even beyond that, to reach a level of enlightened equanimity, to relate to the world directly, without judgment, without involvement of an ego-strategy.
"You only arrive at the other shore when you finally realize that there is no other shore...we have arrived when we realize that we were there all along. It is very paradoxical" (Chogyam Trungpa, Cutting Through Spiritual Materialism).
We don't try to stop being dissatisfied, we simply discover a new way to look at experience. Then, when we can "sing in our chains like the sea" we come to realize that even the chains are illusory!
This is why I've chosen Carolyn Creedon's Pub Poem (http://www.breakoutofthebox.com/pubpoem.htm) to reflect a personality style that brilliantly focuses on difference:
If I hold my breath for a million years, little oysterwaiting my tables, fighting the tide, swimming to hopeand still I can't open you up, loveI'll marry the fat red tomatoI got from an infatuated farmer who waits pleasantlywith knife and fork, to eat me...
Creedon grips us immediately with this fantastic imagery. The love she wants is an oyster that is difficult to open. And will she marry the infatuated farmer instead? No, she'll marry the fat red tomato he gave her! But whatever she loves will slip away and she will "barely" stay afloat:
I'll marry the teasing moon whose bright vowels dance on the waterlike the Yorktown Slut, promising everythingsighing, before she slips away...I'll marry each barnacle I scrubbare, barely staying afloat...
The "barnacles" Creedon scrubs are a crust on the boat of the Four's special self. Only a "bent" mirror can reproduce that complex worldview: "I am both unique and flawed":
I'll marry the bent mirror in the backwhere I pin up my marmalade hair...
Her lover knows her downfall:
I'll marry my beautiful brown teacher whose letters,which say angst is my downfall, I read on the sneakon a Budweiser box amongst the dead clams and unconsummated lemonsin the back of the Pub, I'll marry my downfall.
She will marry her "angst"! People of this personality style are more in touch with their feelings than other types, to a fault. They can easily focus on their own defects and sink into moodiness; their conversation is ripe with sad stories (and fat red tomatoes). Fours often feel on the outside looking in. This gives them their unique perspective but also deepens the anguish of feeling alone, even abandoned. Jennifer Merri Parker writes in Four to One (http://www.breakoutofthebox.com/fourtoone.htm), "I am like the ever almost unrequited lover, not / unlike a loitering angel pacing, poised to trouble water..." She wants to be joined in her angst:
...I must finally plumb the fathoms of your feelings and anointyour clean, still-water surface with my muddy-fingered messand smear your eyes with miracles of sentimental grimetill you confess I wasn't in the maelstrom by myself,but you were there and felt it all the time.
Long one of my favorite poets, e.e. cummings was fanciful in both imagery and the way his poems were arranged on the page. His romantic poems capture the way in which Fours will keep their wounds unhealed by memories of lost love. In Sonnets--Unrealities. III. (http://www.breakoutofthebox.com/sonnet.htm) he relishes the "strangeness" of his love:
...moments when the glassy darkness holdsthe genuine apparition of your smile(it was through tears always) and silence mouldssuch strangeness as was mine a little while.
In these moments when cummings relives that "fascination," he also opens the reader's eyes to:
one pierced moment whiter than the rest
Notice, though, how his piercing moment is a dagger that sustains unhappiness in the present:
--turning from the tremendous lie of sleepi watch the roses of the day grow deep.
It is no surprise that cummings' roses grow "deep." Feeling more deeply than anyone else haunts Fours. Countering their special depths, they also envy others' apparent happiness. In their "bent mirror," this shows up as dissatisfaction with the ordinary. The grass surrounding them becomes a "cage" in Mary Karr's poem, The Worm-Farmer's Lament (http://www.breakoutofthebox.com/wormfarmer.htm):
...Once you reach the final pointof all those roads cut by granite-facedancestors and even your ownforgettable efforts, then the spiritis so stalled by arrivalthat the long grasses become a cage,the long fields blank....you suddenly long to shove your armdown the disposal or rest your headin the trash compactor or just climb in your not-quite-paid for wagonto breathe clouds till you can stopbreathing, stop sitting there and startworm-farming, that thankless tradeno one wrote back about,the quiet work for which you were born.
Yes, Fours may have suicidal thoughts, torn between their unique vision and dissatisfaction with the "worm-farm" in which they must make their way. Van Gogh's life and paintings are the arch example. Dorothy Parker, in Résumé (http://www.breakoutofthebox.com/resume.htm), attacks this depressive tendency:
Razors pain you;Rivers are damp;Acids stain you;And drugs cause cramp.Guns aren't lawful;Nooses give;Gas smells awful;You might as well live.
This is what most Fours decide: "I might as well live." At their best, they learn to see the beauty in each moment as it evolves. Jane Kenyon discloses the nature of her path when she discovers a stone in "a little space between the south / side of a boulder / and the snow that fills the woods around it" (Depression in Winter): (http://www.breakoutofthebox.com/depression.htm)
…I sank with every step up to my knees,throwing myself forward with a violenceof effort, greedy for unhappiness--until by accident I found the stone,with its secret porch of heat and light,where something small could luxuriate, thenturned back down my path, chastened and calm.
From their surreal vantage point, Fours enact their longing for a better world by attracting those of us who feel broken, and breaking us free from our own woundings. True shepherds, they learn from their own "wild child," finding the "fallen fledgling," the "bummer lamb," and drawing "the abused, the starvelings" into an empathic embrace, as Maxine Kumin does in Nurture (http://www.breakoutofthebox.com/nurture.htm):
...And had there been a wild child...a wild child to love, it is safe to assume,given my fireside inked with paw prints,there would have been room.Think of the language we two, same and not-same,might have constructed from sign,scratch, grimace, grunt, vowel:Laughter our first noun, and our long verb, howl.
image: The Mask
Albumen Print ca. 1860 Oscar Reglander
National Museum of Natural History
Div. of In formation Technology and Society
Photographic History Collection
